Back-burner the sad, and concentrate on the good stuff 

By Dr. Andy and Renie Bowman
Coffeetimecolumn.com
andybowman839@gmail.com

Living in a desert in the summertime, a real actual desert, you have to learn to make choices. Choices that can make or break how well you thrive in this rather harsh environment.

You can focus your thoughts and attention on the unrelenting ‘cook your soul’ heat in the summer, or you can anticipate the six months of near perfect temperatures in winter time. You can easily resent the burning hot sand and jagged rocks, or instead, you can choose to raise your eyes to those beautiful, hazy, purple-shaded mountains in the distance that surround your city.

Driving down the highways, I can watch the native scrub brush and cactus passing by that admittedly are not my favorites, or I can deliberately focus my attention on the colorful native flowers and lacy-leaved trees and bushes that are everywhere in my neighborhood.

Concentrating on the oppressive heat that builds as the day progresses is easy to do. And definitely a mood destroyer. Much better to bounce yourself out of bed early in the morning and get outside while there is still a trace of desert-cool in the air. And then spend your busy day anticipating watching the lazy movement of huge gas-powered balloons floating in the beautiful evening sky while you sip on an icy drink. 

I can mourn the thousands of miles that now separate me from my siblings back home, or I can look forward to being a free-of-charge destination spot for vacationing relatives.

My point? Deliberately make choices. Choices that are good and healthy for your mental and physical well-being. Anyone with half a functioning brain can choose to concentrate on the unfortunate and hurtful things in their life. Everyone alive has pain or worry that they can choose to be the focal point of their life. 

But it’s a much smarter decision to deliberately set out each day to find the positives. Too often people make the choice to view their days thru gloomy glasses, concentrating on the distressing thoughts in their life.  And then wonder why they live year after year in depression and bitterness.

Decide to back-burner the ugly and sad, and concentrate on choosing to look for the good stuff.  

Sure, I know that we can’t just ignore the bad part of our lives and make it all go away. But we can choose what we make first and foremost. And making the sad part of your life first and foremost just isn’t smart.

Your deliberate choices do matter. You actually can find beauty and contentment in the middle of ugliness and difficulty. But only if you begin each day determined that you will find some tiny bit of good in your circumstances. Then focus on that.

Choices have the ability to make or break you. They can haze over the ugly, or make you blind to everything except what you resent or hate about your life. 

Your choice. Your days. Your life.