The queen and the poison

By Christine Tailer
HCP columnist

She stood tall, but he stood even taller. He took pride in the fact that he could look down on her from his 10-foot vantage. She was rightfully wary of his towering presence. When she saw him across the valley fields, she tried not to acknowledge his presence. She preferred to tilt her flower crown skyward toward the sun, the clouds and nighttime stars. Thankfully, she rarely stood close to him. His preference was to stand by the valley's ditches and runs, leaving her the higher and drier ground.

She had actually grown to despise him, and that is a strong sentiment for a gentle queen, but she knew that his presence along the edges of the fields was nothing short of wicked. She knew that passersby often mistook him for her. How could they possibly be so mistaken? She pondered, and then quickly understood. They look so much alike. They are family after all, and as with many families, they share striking similarities.

They share not only their height, but both are also crowned with broad white flower heads made up of hundreds of individual fleurettes, though his flower head is domed while hers is rather flat, and in the center of the queen's flower sits a small dark jewel, befitting a queen.

They also wear similar fern-like attire of pointed flat leaves, but the queen's grayish green leaves are finely divided and sport a curiously course, almost hairy, texture for such a fine lady. His dark green leaves, unlike hers, are hairless and glossy. Then, should the queen's leaves ever bruise, they fill the air with a healthy carrot-like scent, while his crushed leaves emit a rank, unpleasant odor. Even though they are related, and appear similar on first glance, they really are quite different.

Perhaps the most striking difference is found in the tall stems that support their flower crowns. Her stem is solid green, and like her leaves, is covered in fine hairs. (Apparently, the queen does not like to shave her legs). His stem is smooth, and covered with blood red blotches, befitting the toxic fellow he is.

The queen has tried to call out to the world and warn folks about her poisonous relative, but sadly, she has no voice, so one day, as I was passing by, her gentle carrot scent reached out to me. I approached her. I saw her hairy green stem, unmarred by red. I saw the jewel in the center of her flower head, and I promised to spread the word.

Queen Anne's lace is a lovely lady, but poison hemlock is wicked. He contains toxins that can be fatal if ingested, and if they sneak into your bloodstream through a cut or rash, they can cause serious illness.

The queen wishes for you to remember their differences. When I stopped by to let her know that I had spread her warning among my friends, she gently bobbed her jeweled flower crown and bent her hairy stem in a regal curtsy.

Christine Tailer is an attorney and former city dweller who moved several years ago, with her husband, Greg, to an off-grid farm in south-central Ohio. Visit them on the web at straightcreekvalleyfarm.com.